I Love Book Clubs
Friday, July 1st, 2011
I don’t belong to any book clubs. But I sure do love being in them.
I grew up in the pre-book club era, when people who read books didn’t think in terms of gathering once a month in a living room with a dozen friends, food, wine, and maybe a set agenda, and then spending two hours, or at least some part of two hours, discussing the book. In my formative years, readers tended to read books on their own, then keep their pleasure, disappointment, and questions to themselves. At best they might have shared their reactions to a book in an impromptu way, with one friend, bookstore acquaintance, or library patron at a time.
This isn’t to say that there weren’t people who really wanted to talk in groups about the books they’d been reading. From what I could tell, many of them satisfied this need by becoming English majors, English teachers, booksellers, book reviewers, and people in publishing.
But I wasn’t someone who was bursting to talk about what I was reading with others. I was happy to ask if an individual person had read a certain book and even happier to take their recommendations, though I liked the solitary nature of reading. For one thing, I wasn’t a joiner. For another, I could read at my own pace, and according to my own taste. And for yet another, I was less likely to hurt other people’s feelings if they waxed rhapsodic about a book I hadn’t taken to, and I was equally unlikely to get strange looks if I sang the praises of a book they’d found wanting, or highfalutin. I could also explore subjects and authors without risking an unpleasant reaction. (“What do you mean, you love Rod Serling?” I imagined someone saying when, in eighth grade, I read everything he’d written.) I could also indulge in rereading books, which I was very fond of doing. Plus, if I didn’t understand the appeal of a bestselling thriller, or literary classic, or postmodern tour de force that I was supposed to enjoy, I didn’t have to admit it. In short, I liked to be on my own as a reader because I could avoid judging, and being judged by, others.Not surprisingly, I wasn’t an English major. I loved hanging out with them, but I was just fine reading on my own. During graduate school, when I got my MFA, I had to share my thoughts about books, but I never became comfortable doing so. Since then, I’ve mostly retreated to my old ways, with occasional lapses.
The first time it occurred to me that large numbers of people really, really wanted to read in a more social way was when Oprah Winfrey began her book club in 1996, and suddenly book clubs began springing up everywhere. I was working in a bookstore then, and even though it never occurred to me to join a book club, I saw how quickly and easily they turned strangers into intellectual companions. I also saw how marvelously book clubs could deliver a book from obscurity to popularity. Since I ran the events, I could see how, by creating book discussion groups (which were essentially the equivalent of book clubs), I could hold events that would reliably bring in a dozen, two dozen, maybe even forty people a month – and not just as people who sat beside each other in a circle, but as people who became central to one another’s lives. I could watch these relationships grow month to month, and see the rewards of social reading growing right before my eyes.
Of course, I also learned that sometimes book clubs don’t work out smoothly. Friends have told me about book clubs spoiled by a lax commitment to reading, or a domineering personality, or a tendency for more members to talk than to listen. But most people I know are now in book clubs, and most book clubs seem to be sources of great joy. Plus, they inspire people to read.
Those alone would be reason enough for me to love book clubs, even without joining one. But I also love book clubs because, as a writer, I am sometimes asked to visit them, and when I do I often discover a warm, friendly, mutually-respectful, often long-term community of smart, well-read, good-natured, open-minded, story-admiring women. That is, women who, except for being in a book club, are a lot like me (or at least a lot like the me I hope I am). They tend to be passionate about their families or careers or both. They tend to enjoy a good laugh. They appreciate craft on the page and often in additional realms, like interior design or fine art. They’re people who like to ask questions. They’re people who like to think.

I have been lucky. Many of the readers who love my books belong to book clubs, and sometimes, when my book gets selected as their next title, they get in touch and ask if I might possibly come for a visit. I suppose their goal is to enhance their understanding of the book and to demystify the mysterious author who produced it. My goal is a little different. Yes, by visiting their clubs, I can give the members insights into my writing that they couldn’t get anywhere else. But that’s far from the only goal. I also love having the opportunity to be, however briefly, around the kind of people who are in book clubs. Sometimes I even get to feel that sense of community, even if I’m on the outside. So in a way, it’s the best of all worlds.
My schedule doesn’t always allow for visits, but fortunately technology is now providing new options. So sometimes I visit on speaker phone, as I will be doing with a book club in Atlanta, Georgia in mid-July. Sometimes I visit on a Skype video call, as I’m discussing doing with several book clubs right now. Sometimes it means I can get there in person.
This week, I was in three book clubs. One was online, one was in person, and one was on the radio. Despite how varied the situations were, I loved all three.
The online book club.

The retail bookseller Borders decided in May to start an e-book club, and to make The Story of Beautiful Girl their first selection. Kelly and David, the folks in charge of the e-book club, had a long, lively phone conversation with me in early June to discuss how the club would play out. They wanted to put several posts with additional material about the book on their e-book blog, with readers being instructed to read to a certain page before looking at each. So for the last few weeks, I’ve worked with them to create these posts. It was fun to discuss the material in the book with people who really care. It was also a delight to see how personal their posts turned out to be.
You can read their initial post about the book club here.
The first post with additional material brings up the real life person of John Doe #24, and provides links to the book God Knows His Name, by Dave Bakke, and the song “John Doe Number 24″ by Mary Chapin Carpenter. It also gives the story behind this incredible painting of the opening of my book, which was done by the artist John Dusko. You can see that post here.The second post with additional material provides background about institutions for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. This post also clarifies that, in most states, these were different places than institutions for people who had mental health issues. This post also gives information about what’s happening with institutions today. You can read it here.
The final post focuses on the character of Kate, the direct care worker who’s so important to Lynnie over the course of the book. In this post, you can learn about the field of Direct Support Professionals, including what they do and why they’re so important. You’ll also learn about the severe labor shortage in this field and why it’s such a dire problem. You can read it here.
Then the book club culminated on Thurs., June 30, with a live chat on Facebook. What a thrill that was! The messages flew thick and fast for the entire two hours. Many of the participants had read The Story of Beautiful Girl, but some got involved with the chat because they were fans of my earlier books, like Riding The Bus With My Sister, or The Magic Touch. It was exciting to get so many questions and comments, in real time, from readers I already knew, and readers I was just meeting for the first time. And yes, they were all smart, interesting, engaged people. It was a total pleasure!
The chat, which went on for five screens worth of material, can be seen at this link.
The in-person book club
A new friend named Joani is in a book club based in Cherry Hill, NJ, and when they selected The Story of Beautiful Girl for their June read, she asked if I could meet with them. I said yes, adding my caveat for driving to a book club: twenty or more people needed to be present, with each person buying my book in advance. To my delight, she said that would work, adding that she’d make sure the group was even larger.
Her book club members then invited two friends each, with everyone being expected to read the book in advance. On Monday night, they rented a small restaurant, Chef’s Kitchen Bistro, for the entire evening, and I drove to Cherry Hill and met them there.
Thirty-two people showed up at 6:30 PM, and we then spent the next two and a half hours eating delicious food prepared by the owner, Seth, and his assistant Vlad, and discussing the book at length. The book club members, who’d made a point of finishing the book before our visit – with one person reaching the final page at 5:02 PM that very night! – were full of insight and heart, and were as excited by the opportunity to meet me as I was to meet them. Vlad took pictures throughout the evening, which you can see at this link.
It was a joy it was to talk with people who already knew the whole book, as it gave me the freedom to speak about details that I would otherwise have been forced to ignore or be elusive about. It was also a joy to answer questions at length, since I knew they really wanted to hear everything I wanted to share. The leisurely duration of the evening also have me the opportunity to show them the artwork by self-advocates that I use in my more formal talks; I just opened my laptop, everyone crowded around, and Seth and Vlad turned off the lights. We stood there in the dark restaurant, smiling away as we looked at laptop screen.
Finally, I signed books – when I could. Several people had read a digital version so they didn’t have anything for me to sign, though one enterprising woman suggested that I sign my business card. But whether I signed something or not, when we said goodbye and the group fanned out into the night, many people said they were going to tell all the book clubs they knew to read The Story of Beautiful Girl. I waved goodbye, and hoped they would.
I know I can’t visit every book club in person, but it’s nice to know that my characters might do the visiting for me.
The radio book club
Voices In the Family is a relationship- and psychology-oriented call-in show on my local public radio station, WHYY-FM. It’s hosted by a compassionate, thoughtful, and deeply open man, Dr. Dan Gottlieb, who’s a nationally known speaker and the author of several books. Dr. Dan is also a person who knows firsthand about suffering and survival; in 1979 he was in a car accident that rendered him paralyzed from the chest down. His wisdom about what it means to be human, and his honesty about his own sense of vulnerability, have made him one of the most popular and beloved broadcast personalities in the Philadelphia area.
So when Dr. Dan read The Story of Beautiful Girl, and told me, “This is the best book I’ve ever read,” it meant a lot. And when he asked me to appear on Voices In The Family, it meant even more. But I was over the moon when he informed me that he’d decided to start a Voices In The Family book club so his listeners would be encouraged to read the book.

When it comes to public radio, I’m what you’d call a heavy listener. We have a radio in every room in the house, and all of them are tuned to WHYY. And for the last two weeks, I’d had a little thrill several times a day when the announcers read a brief promo about the book club, inviting listeners to tune into my discussion with Dr. Dan on Monday, June 27th.
In advance of the broadcast, Jennifer Lynn, the producer, told me they hoped to have a few additional guests: a person who could speak about the history of institutions for people with developmental disabilities, and a person who had lived in one. I told her I knew just the right people to contact, and I put her in touch with Jim Conroy and Jean Searle. Jim is the founder and president of The Center for Outcome Analysis, a non-profit firm founded in 1985 to perform evaluation, research, and demonstration projects in the human services and health care services. Jean is a self-advocate who was institutionalized at age 12 and released years later only as a result of the judge-ordered closure of the Pennhurst State School. Jim and Jean are also co-presidents of the Pennhurst Memorial and Preservation Alliance.
We all showed up early, gathering in the lobby of WHYY well before the show began at noon. Soon Dr. Dan and Jennifer Lynn led us back to the studio. A man who helps support Jean took photos of us, along with intern Emily Hauze.
Then we were on.
It was quite a powerful experience with just the four of us in the room. For the first segment, Dr. Dan focused his questions on me. In the second segment, he spoke with Jim about the history of institutions, and Jean about her personal experience. During the third segment, all three of us spoke. And throughout, there were calls and emails from listeners.
The four of us exchanged many smiles and knowing glances over the course of that hour. We also had to watch ourselves so we wouldn’t make a peep except when we were being asked to speak up. Despite the effort we had to put into keeping quiet, the sense of camaraderie was a great pleasure, and it helped offset the challenges of discussing such serious topics.
Even though I didn’t get to meet the members of this book club in the way I did with the Cherry Hill group, I still had the opportunity to speak with several callers. One shared his love of the book in a way that was so emotional, it brought me almost to tears. Others had questions or comments about the interview and the subject matter. And others sent in emails that didn’t make it onto the air, but that told deeply personal stories about their own family histories.
Later in the day, I received emails and calls from friends and supporters who told me they hadn’t called in but had just listened. They’d tuned in too late, or realized the format wouldn’t allow them to speak at the length they might have liked.
But maybe some of those people didn’t call in because, like me, they’re solitary readers. If so, I hope the Voices In The Family book club gave them the same feeling of camaraderie as it gave me.
You can listen to the podcast of this show by clicking here. Then you can be a part of this book club, too.
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I hope you’ll consider reading Dr. Dan’s latest book, The Wisdom of Sam, for your book club. It’s about his special bond with his grandson Sam, who has autism.
To learn more about Dan Gottlieb, please check out his website here.
You can also watch a video of him and Sam by clicking here.


































































































































































































